Some people wake up in the mornings and invest in themselves. They drink a cup of coffee, take a shower, eat food.
Some roll out of bed, grab an energy drink and shoes, and run out the door.
Some laze about for a while.
It takes me about 30-45 minutes, on an easy day, to get up.
I sit up fast - I've undoubtedly slept through every alarm again. I stare around the room I hate, blinking hard and reaching for the red bulls by the bed. I might eat a couple bites of whatever food I had the foresight to put nearby.
I think to myself - okay, let's get up and do today.
And then I realize that I have to do today.
And my entire body tenses. I am filled with an overwhelming, drowning feeling of terror. I'm not ready. I am not ready to wash tools. I am not ready to interact with people who want to know about my life or their bodies. I am not ready to use my words. I am not ready.
Calm down. Sip your drink. Take your time. Do your makeup. Put on clothes. It's okay. You have twenty minutes to get it together and act like a normal person.
Act like a normal person.